Why would I want to be with a man who is not there (or here) for me?
Maybe I am contradicting myself, yet again. The last couple of months I’ve been unconsciously whispering to people “Fuck off, leave me alone.”
So I’m left alone.
On a positive note, Carl is a man with his doors open.
I got picked up and driven to Carl's place to watch a comedy. And it was really funny! I’m happy about my decision to come and sample a biodynamic red wine which tasted divine - the most delicious alcohol I've had in ages.
I think I should be more giving.
If I look too much into it, I still have blocks surrounding men and 'dating'. And strangely, after so much learning, I still manage to attract the cold ones, the busy ones, and the non communicative ones. If there are emotionally challenged jerks out there, rest assured that I'd pick them up. Is this about to end, God? I am doing my best to be the opposite - very authentic, transparent and communicating - as to not be a hypocrite!
Carl seems like an exception. So it mildly freaks me out. Oh, and the other day I had a morning coffee/tea with one fellow dancer, Jonathan, and it went really well. Likewise, he is a different breed than what I’m used to. We have a dinner on Wednesday night.
Time to finish my assignment for Marketing…