Saturday, January 21, 2017

Online Dating Good or Bad?

Last night's dream* brings me to the idea of online dating.
I tried it here in Australia (for two weeks) and in the USA. In the US, it was quite entertaining for a while, and I think I managed to sustain one little affair which was exciting, however, I'd never felt like anything significant went on between us two - and I loved the simplicity. I used to be a commitment phobe. Ummm, is used to be the right expression?
In Australia, getting over my ex didn't get easier by browsing pictures of dozens of men I found dull-looking on e-harmonyI interacted with 2 ‘eligible’ ones, only to cancel one meeting at the last minute, and another shortly after arranging it!
I wasn’t ready to talk to date-eager males.
Maybe I believe that online dating isn't the most enjoyable - and safe - way of finding the right partner.

These days I hear people talking about actively looking for partners or flings online (Tinder and such), and actually having face to face dates as frequently as they have their coffees. So eager... but I respect that. 
On another note, I hear them talking about meeting up with all those women or men, all the while nothing serious and joyous is forming with any of the mentioned candidates.
According to R. Raye, dating is still a good thing. So *Thumbs up*

Finding relationship-worthy dates online? I am biased.
My ex and I first interacted on a travel website - the equivalent of an internet dating site for the purpose of illustrating my punch line.
We had spent 2-3 months on a virtual foreplay. I made some illusions about him already during those whats-up chats and skype calls joined with grainy/dotted videos (his outdated phone and a bad reception).
He started idolizing me back then, and I already incorporated him into my dreams and sexual fantasies.

Let's cut to the core.
The reality proved to be different. But did I see it clearly once we were already physically together? No.
Only my friend Tom helped me see that this boy was a lunatic. I had a fearful idea that he must have been, which I kept suppressing and denying.
Bottom line - would I get crazy about him, have I first seen him face to face? Have I first talked to him face to face, and only after proceeded text messaging rather than vice versa? Would I like him, have I first observed him out and about? Or conversed with him first in a pub, cafe, shop, an event and let it sink that he truly was empty, before watching silent photos of him? Would I experience any heartbreak, have I first and foremost seen him in person before starting chatting with him online?
I would not fall for this guy. I wouldn't want to have him chatting me up face to face, neither pestering me virtually!

Online dating, in my opinion, robs us of an early reality check. Therefore, it sucks BIG TIME!

If I write an ad: 
Looking for an intelligent, brave, faithful man with a fun personality and good looks.... 10 chaps response to that with : Oh you are the most georgoues woman I've seen! Can I invite you for a drink around midnight?

Honestly.... I don't think you read my ad, as you most likely don't ever read at all!

I will choose spontaneous, real, personal interactions over virtual hide&seek foreplays anytime! 
If my new date blows up, maybe I shall create a poster and stick it on my back as I move about libraries, cozy cafes, organic shops, and yoga classes... hmm.

P.S: One month ago my best friend M. got married to a guy she met online.
It works for some....
Just saying.

What do you think about online dating???

I had a weird dream about my ex.
Jane and I had been discussing him that previous evening, talking about the intelligence of human bodies when it comes to finding the right or wrong mate (I promise more on that later!).

I normally don't even remember Him over the course of the day, and he rarely comes to my mind because of some external stimuli. That's a fantastic news close to our 1year break-up anniversary!
The dream had me wake up with my heart racing. It wasn't very pleasant. He laid his hand on my heart and pushed me away from him, I could actually feel my heart breaking and hurting.
The dream dictionary says that I lack love and support in life, I have some emotional turmoil, or I reject a part of myself.
It is not true for this moment. Is that a prediction for the future?

I also want to stress again - I am absolutely over that *** !
Now, I could say "fuck" or "a beautiful being". The first is not my style, and the second, ehm, is sarcasm!
So, that's why I don't get that dream.

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